Monday 6:45pm 22Jan07
I've gone into week two of being plagued by constant frustrations. This is usually the point when I leave, disappear out of people's lives never to be heard from again. But I'm tired of running. I'm tired of fighting all the battles or even choosing my battles. The whole drama is too exhausting.
It's taken me a full two weeks to get my energy level back from being sick from a cold/stomach flu combo. The good thing about that is I had to approach the frustrations from a different angle. Instead of fighting it off with words, speaking up about the injustice of it all, I've had to stew in my thoughts.
I've got goals I want to work on, things I want to do with my life. I can't keep my focus on my goals if I'm caught in the mire of frustrations.
I came home one night last week and freeflowed for an hour, my nightly ritual to cleanse my mind of the residual junk or frustration or stress that I may carry home with me that keeps me from writing. In the midst of the mind cleanse, I wrote that the frustrations were there to push me foreward with my goals. They are messages telling me to work diligently on my goals rather than running away which has been my modus operandi my whole adult life.
I lived the motto, "If you don't like it, walk away."
Not these days. These days, although I haven't found a clear motto, my mottos has something to do with not getting too complacent. Don't be too comfortable but know that I'm in the perfect place, the perfect situation to serve my purpose.
Yeah, my frustrations are God's way of telling me to keep focused on my goals.
What do your frustrations mean to you?